We’re relentless in our self-defeating struggle to find lasting satisfaction in what is temporary, to find inner contentment in what is external.

If we imagine that our happiness depends on another, we put an intolerable burden upon that other. Our desire not to learn is often so great that when one relationship is over, we immediately set out in search of another, hoping that the right person will confer lasting happiness upon us. We refuse to recognize that the “right person” is our own true self. Only when we have been truly alone, only when we have deeply experienced our own autonomy and self-sufficiency, can we truly be with another. Until then, no true relationship is possible. Until then, our love is merely a shadow of love.

There comes a time when we grow impatient with shadows – or when they are suddenly withdrawn. At such times, we recognize that we have always been alone, that our attempts to protect ourselves from our aloneness through all kinds of outer identifications are ultimately doomed to failure.

We all come to a sense of fundamental aloneness in different ways. For some, it comes through the death of a relative or close friend; for others, through the loss of a cherished love relationship; for still others, through some apparent catastrophic experience and abrupt feeling of disillusionment that results from it. At such times, the attachments and identifications through which we have mistakenly defined ourselves are stripped away, and we feel painfully alone and exposed.

Little do we suspect that the stripping away, although it can be scary, is the action of grace. The purifying power of God’s grace erases the self-imposed limitations of the ego, thus clearing the ground for a rebirth of the Spirit, and for renewed growth.

Though not so dramatic, grace constantly works for all of us, breaking down all obstacles and revealing our inner autonomy.

Instead of the cry of the ego, “All is lost,” we hear emerging from within a new cry, “Nothing has ever been missing!” All sense of separation vanishes, into an all-inclusive unity.

What If…

What if the only thing we had to do upon awakening each morning was to find somebody to help? Just that. Only that. And then after we’d helped that one, we had to go and round up another one? What if our entire purpose for being was only that?

And what if God spoke directly to your heart and said, “If you really want to celebrate Me, find ways to love and serve each other. As you look at the world through the eyes of love, everything you see and every act you perform will be sacred, and you will be reminded that everything is My Spirit. Just the simple act of a kind word, a smile, a touch, or taking food and clothing to those in need can make a profound difference.”

And what if God continued by saying, “Life is about something more transcendent than you can imagine, and these acts of pure service have a wonderful power to heal the wounds of the heart, body, and emotions.”

“As you serve each other, you are sharing the experience of unity. You are walking each other home.”